Catfishing: How to protect yourself from the nasty dating trend

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Online dating is a common method of looking for the love of your life, casual sex or other types of interpersonal relationships. But looking for a partner on the Internet should be approached with caution. Behind attractive dating profiles, there are often nasty dating trends lurking. They mislead us, play with our feelings and possibly threaten our existence. Catfishing is one of those dating scams that can change our lives in a negative way.

What is catfishing?

Catfishing is the creation of fake profiles on dating apps to lure people into relationships online, whether friendly or romantic. Catfishers pretend to be someone they are not by uploading stolen images and false information. They differ from trolls or other online scammers in that they build a relationship with someone and maintain it over a long period of time. As such, they are emotionally abusive and deceptive.

Where does the term catfishing come from?

The term comes from the 2010 documentary "Catfish," in which young Nev Schulman begins an online relationship with teenage girl "Megan," who turns out to be an older woman. In the documentary's closing scene, the scammer's husband tells an anecdote about how live Alaskan cod were exported along with catfish that preyed on them in the containers, which kept the cod active and alert. He compared this to people in real life who keep others on their toes - like his wife.

Why do people do this?

There is no one motive for catfishing. Some catfishers are lonely, have low self-esteem, and want a relationship with someone they don't think would be interested in them in real life. Others want to troll, harass, or get revenge on their victims. Here are other possible reasons:

• Fraud: The catfisher tries to get money and tries to persuade his victims to transfer large amounts of money by pretending to be in a romantic relationship.
• Bullying: The scammer tricks his or her victims into revealing secrets or sending images and uses these things against them.
• Boredom: There are also people among the catfishers who pull this scam out of sheer boredom.
• Insecurity: Sometimes people become catfishers out of insecurity. Maybe they don't think they are attractive or lovable enough and therefore assume a false identity.
• Control: Monitoring someone or winning them back after a relationship ends could also be a motive.
• Revenge: The person may also want to take revenge on an ex-partner who has hurt him/her deeply.

• For weeks or months, the person finds reasons and excuses not to meet you in person and refuses video calls.
• The person tells you tragic stories and asks you for money .
• The person will quickly tell you many supposedly personal details in order to gain your trust.
• As soon as you threaten to break off contact, the person will make an effort and promise to meet you – only to not keep the plan again.
• The profile does not allow any conclusions to be drawn about the person – and yes, many people try not to leave a trace on the Internet and social media, but you can usually find out something…
• The person expresses his or her feelings unusually quickly .
• The contact has exactly the same interests as you and, strangely enough, you agree on everything. Either he is a people pleaser or the person is really very untrustworthy...
• You keep discovering inconsistencies in the stories he/she tells about himself/herself.

You now know the signs of catfishing. But love is also blind. When we are in love with someone, we tend to ignore possible red flags or scams. But there are a few things you can do to protect yourself from catfishing.

• Don't send photos or other very personal details about yourself until you are absolutely sure who you are talking to.
• Let your friends know that you are talking to this person. From the outside, scams can often be identified much earlier.
• As mentioned above, catfishers often shower their victims with affection in order to quickly build a deeper bond. Don't be afraid to slow down or even cut off contact if you feel uncomfortable or overwhelmed.
• Be suspicious. We live in a world where the internet is a dangerous place. A good dose of suspicion and caution can protect you. Pay attention to inconsistencies in the contact's stories and question them. If more and more inconsistencies emerge, the person is obviously trying to deceive you.
• Open Google Photo Search. In most cases, catfishers steal their photos and identities from the Internet. Using the "reverse search" you can determine whether the photos already exist on other platforms under a different identity.
• If the person asks you for a lot of money , for example because they are supposedly seriously ill, you should pay attention - and under no circumstances send any money.
• Insist on a face-to-face meeting and don't let yourself be put off again and again. If this happens, break off contact quickly.

In and of itself, catfishing is not considered a criminal act. Creating a fake online profile is not illegal in principle. However, it could violate the social network's guidelines if you create a profile with false information. However, catfishing can have criminal consequences if illegal activities take place while using the fake profile. Therefore, the legal assessment depends largely on the individual details of the specific case. In any case, do not hesitate to seek police advice if something seems strange to you in order to protect yourself and others.

Sources used:

joe Brigitte

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