Is your child eating poorly? Six things you should never do and six you should, according to a pediatric dietitian.

One of the most common problems parents of young children face is when they are reluctant to eat . Mealtime or dinnertime can become a torture when little ones refuse to eat the food on their plates.

Lucy Upton is a pediatric dietitian and author of The Ultimate Guide to Children's Nutrition , and in statements collected by the Mirror , she explains what six things we should never do and what six things we should always do to deal with these situations.

Don't label the child

Try to avoid phrases like "he won't eat that because he's very particular about food" whenever they hear them. Children can pick up on this and internalize it, and before you know it, you could have a child telling you they won't eat something because they're particular.

Don't insist too much

Communication is easily overlooked, but it has a huge impact on how children learn about food and their mealtime experiences.

A study exploring parental mealtime behavior found that parents urge their children to eat an average of 17.5 times per meal, and in some cases, they urge their children to eat as many as 30 or 40 times.

These stimuli often create more pressure on the child and more difficulties at mealtime. The numerous forms of persuasion (convincing, coaxing, excessive encouragement or praise, or any phrases or language used to persuade or attempt to control the child's eating) should be avoided. Studies show that these factors ultimately increase the likelihood of selective eating behaviors.

Don't label foods

Labeling foods as 'good' or 'bad', 'healthy' or 'unhealthy', 'junk' or 'bad' can lead young children to believe that if they eat them, they themselves are 'good' or 'bad'.

Studies have shown that children feel guilty when they eat foods they're told are "bad." Language like this can also lead to confusion, unnecessary fear, or unhelpful attitudes and behaviors toward food.

Don't restrict some foods too much.

It's also important to avoid excessively restricting your child's access to "bad" foods. Research shows that while some limits are beneficial, excessive restrictions can lead to overeating or unhealthy attitudes toward those foods in the long term.

You can set healthy, age-appropriate limits without resorting to excessive restrictions. For example, if your child asks for a cookie , let them know that their next snack will be a piece of fruit, but that cookies will be available another day.

Don't deny dessert if you haven't finished lunch or dinner.

If you plan to offer ice cream after dinner, do so regardless of what your child has or hasn't eaten, or what they have or haven't "achieved" in terms of behavior. Research shows that linking food with behavior can lead older children or adults to "reward" or "punish" themselves with food.

Don't 'sell' food for its benefits

Don't try to convince your child to eat something because it's 'healthy' or 'good for them.' Young children can't grasp these concepts with the nuance and critical thinking required.

Their brains aren't yet developed enough for this type of reasoning. Children may also perceive this type of language as pressure to eat that food, which, for many, will reduce their interest in eating it or diminish their enjoyment of it.

Limit distractions

Using a screen prevents your child from learning about food: It's much harder to pay attention to others or the food at the table when they're distracted by a screen.

Television and cell phones slow down mealtimes: Many parents have to instruct their children to eat because they're distracted. They also make it harder for children to pay attention to their bodies' hunger and satiety cues because their bodies are trying to process multiple sensory stimuli.

Be comfortable

Concentrating on a task is difficult when you're uncomfortable, and this is especially true for children at mealtimes. If your child constantly fidgets, tries to get up from their chair, sits on their knees, or leans on the table, check their sitting position. Make sure they have personal space while eating.

Let him serve himself

Everyone starts the meal with an empty plate , and all food options are available in the center of the table. Your child can choose what and how much of each food goes on their plate (self-service when possible).

Be careful with pecking

A pattern of overeating or snacking can, of course, disrupt appetite regulation in young children. Parents of children who eat poorly often acquiesce to multiple treat requests motivated by concern that their children aren't eating enough.

If these indulgences significantly reduce your appetite for main meals, you may need to limit them.

Keep calm

A stressful environment doesn't prepare the body for eating; quite the opposite. We need to be in a calm and alert state before eating, avoiding situations that increase stress or trigger our fight-or-flight response.

Stress reduces our appetite and makes it difficult for the brain to be ready to absorb new information, neither of which is ideal when it comes to mealtime.

In your child's world, stress or pressure around mealtimes can lead to food refusal or hypervigilance about the foods offered.

Use collaborative language

Try phrases like "we're eating" or "can we put some peas on our plate" instead of using a lot of child-centered language, which can increase the pressure on the child.