Extremely Embarrassing: 'My Ex Wanted Me to Get His Name Tattooed After Two Months'

In the Extremely Embarrassing section, each week a reader shares a story about that one ex that he or she will never forget: in a positive or very negative way.

This week in Extremely Embarrassing : Julia (29) talks about her ex who pressured her to get his name tattooed on her body. “This wasn’t just a romantic gesture, this was manipulation.”

Julia: "Simon and I met at a party. We saw each other and we clicked right away. After about a month of dating, we officially started dating. We always had fun together in the beginning: we went to a nice restaurant every weekend, walked in the park and had increasingly deeper conversations.

After a few weeks Simon started talking more about the future. At first I thought he was just really excited about us, but it actually started to get more and more awkward. Especially when he suddenly started talking about a tattoo with his name.

"How about tattooing my name on your forearm? It would be a great symbol of our love," he said as if it was the most normal thing in the world. I laughed it off and asked if he would put my name on his forehead. After my joke, I immediately said that I didn't think it was such a good idea. I could tell from his face that he wasn't happy with my reaction.

I could tell that Simon was fixated on the idea after that. It wasn’t long before he started getting serious. “You say you love me, but if you really loved me, you’d put my name on your body. It would be such a beautiful reminder of what we have together,” he said one night as we sat on the couch at my house. I didn’t feel good about it at all, and I told him so. He laughed it off a bit and told me not to be so dramatic.

Two weeks later, he picked me up from work. Nice, I thought, until I saw that he wasn’t alone. He had brought a tattoo artist with him. “Look, he’s made time for you. You can get my name tattooed on your body right after work,” Simon said as he introduced the man to me. My jaw dropped in surprise. This wasn’t just a romantic gesture, this was manipulation. I was so not ready to take such a big step in a relationship that had only lasted two months. It felt like he was backing me into a corner. I had already told him twice that I thought it was a bad idea , so why didn’t he listen?

I asked to speak to him privately and took him to a meeting room. There I told him that I was uncomfortable and that this was really not the way I wanted a relationship to develop. He reacted angrily and said that I didn’t love him enough to do such a ‘small gesture’. He made me feel like I wasn’t serious about the relationship, but I knew that this was something I really didn’t want. So I decided to end the relationship. He stormed off, taking the tattoo artist with him.

It’s been a few months now and I’ve noticed that I’ve struggled with trusting men ever since. What if my next date makes those crazy demands again? I can’t bear to think about it. Even though there were many good times, Simon taught me a lesson about the importance of self-respect in a relationship. Never again.”

Due to privacy in combination with sensitive topics, the names are fictitious. The real names are known to the editors.

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