Penis enlargements, victim support, horse feed: The second careers of fallen Swiss football officials

The date urged caution. On April 1, 2021, an email arrived signed by "lic. iur. Carlo Häfeli, Attorney at Law." Häfeli, something rang a bell; a Zurich resident of that name had slipped into bankruptcy with FC Biel five years earlier. He wrote that he had read the NZZ article on the herpes virus in equestrian sports and had access to a nutritional supplement effective against the virus. He would be happy to help make the preparation available to affected animals.

The subsequent phone call with him didn't suggest this was an April Fool's joke. But whether Häfeli had achieved a feat of hippocracy remained unclear. He didn't respond to a recent inquiry – nor did he answer whether he was still rooting for FC Biel now that the club he once led could win a major title. In Sunday's cup final against FC Basel, the Seelanders even have a chance to achieve what Häfeli dreamed of: qualifying for the European Cup.

Browsing the legal consultant's website today, one comes across a blog with articles such as " Tips for Divorcing Footballers ." Häfeli advises them to secure valuables in the event of a separation from their partner. However, the Jimmy Choo shoes are the wife's personal belongings and therefore her own property—"so don't take them with you."

Häfeli isn't the first to seek fortune in Swiss professional football and end up wrecking it. What might give him courage is that there have been adventurers who, after leaving the club, reoriented themselves and found success. Cameroonian beer brewer Gilbert Kadji, the president of FC Sion who was criticized at the turn of the millennium, runs an academy for football talent in his home country and has produced players like former Barça star Samuel Eto'o.

Or Waldemar Kita. The unrest the Polish-French entrepreneur caused at Lausanne-Sport is often cited as the root of the problem when it comes to the bankruptcy that followed his departure in 2003. Kita has now been at the helm of FC Nantes for eighteen years.

His critics tend to point to Kita's exaggerated self-confidence and stubbornness, but under his leadership, the traditional club has established itself in Ligue 1 and won the cup once. Because Kita now has residences in the canton of Geneva, the magazine "Bilanz" placed him on its list of the "300 richest Swiss." His business idea since 2016: penis enlargements using hyaluronic acid .

But perhaps Häfeli would be better off taking Marc Roger, who was responsible for Servette FC's bankruptcy in 2005, as his role model. He was most recently involved in a community for the socially disadvantaged in the South of France, as "L'Equipe" discovered; it sounded like a Salvation Army thrift shop. Häfeli has also worked for Victim Support Services and the Wollishofen Senior Living Association. If he does want to pursue a career in equestrian sports, he'd be advised not to name his horses "Zealander" or "European Dream."