Leo XIV promises rock festivals inside the Vatican
Metal Headquarters.- As part of his first encyclical, Pope Leo XIV confirmed that, within his plan of “total ecclesiastical modernization,” rock festivals will be organized in the Vatican .
It was during his first press conference that the Supreme Pontiff, dressed in a leather jacket and sunglasses, asserted that rock is “a universal language that pleases God.”
"Who says you can't pray the Lord's Prayer with an electric guitar solo and some damn good drums?" explained the Successor of St. Peter, while revealing a Guns N' Roses shirt beneath his cassock.
According to the official statement from the Holy See, the first festival, tentatively called "Holystock," will feature bands such as Oasis, Metallica, and Evanescence, and will be broadcast live on Vatican Radio.
— Peru Out Of Context (@OutPeru) May 11, 2025
The event will also feature designated spaces for quick confessions, guitar-string rosaries, and special-edition tamarind-vodka-flavored hosts. This is expected to bring millions of young people back to the Catholic faith—and away from reggaeton forever.
Some veteran cardinals expressed bewilderment at the new policies, arguing that “there are rock songs that stir the souls of young people,” although this hasn’t stopped the Vatican from already putting tickets on sale on its SixtinaMaster website.
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