Why has the number of single men increased?
Psychologist Greg Matos claims that men are behind women in having partners. He also emphasizes that this situation was the opposite until 30 years ago.
According to research, one of the main reasons why men have difficulty finding a partner today is “lack of emotional skills.” Women, on the other hand, have increased the criteria they look for in a relationship. Emotional availability, good communication, and shared values are now among the essential qualities that a man should have for most women.
Research shows that women carry the majority of the physical and emotional burden in relationships. This concept, known as the “second shift,” occurs when working women in particular take on responsibilities both at work and at home.
According to data from the Melbourne Institute, women do an average of 21 hours more unpaid housework per week than men, with the gap widening among couples with children.
Moreover, women are less satisfied sexually than men. A study conducted with 52,000 people proved that only 65 percent of heterosexual women orgasm during sexual intercourse, while this rate increases to 95 percent for men. This situation is called the “climax gap.”
The risks women face are not limited to workload and dissatisfaction. According to research, women are at a distinct disadvantage when it comes to experiencing physical, sexual and psychological violence by their male partners.
In the UK, an average of three women are killed by their male partners or ex-partners every fortnight, and women are much more likely than men to be abandoned by their partners if they are seriously ill.
In the past, the main reason why women were forced into relationships was economic dependency. In the times when people could get by on a single salary, women needed men because they did not work. However, today, women are independent both economically and socially.
What's more, until the 1970s, women in the US and UK needed a male guarantor to open a bank account or credit card. Now, women can live their own lives and know that they can be happy without marriage.
While women are becoming stronger, men are not transforming at the same rate, creating an imbalance in relationships. Greg Matos emphasizes that most single men need to develop their emotional skills in order to have healthy relationships.
This deficiency is a result of the "emotionlessness" stereotypes imposed on men in society. Statements such as "Men don't cry" or "Men are tough" push men to suppress their inner worlds.
However, research shows that men live healthier and longer lives when they are married or in a relationship. This shows that men need relationships more.
According to experts, at this point, the responsibility falls entirely on men.
Men need to invest in themselves in areas such as emotional availability, healthy communication, empathy and personal development. At the same time, it is critical for families to raise their sons in a way that is fit for future relationships.
Women no longer see being alone as a deficiency, but as a freedom. Moreover, studies show that unmarried and childless women are statistically the happiest demographic.
Psychological studies show that the path to a real solution is through men transforming themselves.
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